Sitting in the Paris airport, sans coffee and sleep, listening to Adele and dreaming of leg room...i have to say i am feeling pretty good, one flight in and one more to go! I have reached the last 5 miles of this year long marathon and if I am honest there was a mile in there that I didn’t think I would finish…..but with the inability to turn around now and a fresh resolve to finish strong……I find myself digging into to that deeper part where the flesh must die to the unflattering climax of reality…..I came to a cross roads before I left…..i truly did not want to leave; I desired to just stay in the comfortable and surrounded by familiarity….the support of community and family has infested every part of my life and way of being something I had successfully avoided for year…Thus leaving me a little shaky in the legs where I used to be solidly planted in solitude... therefore the thought of going out on my own again completely had lost its appeal….
Then I remembered a few years ago someone prayed over me that Jesus would be taking me on adventures…….and I have to say this is the biggest one to date! And so as I think about what I will miss about home I find a stream of confidence deep inside that reminds me I would not want to miss this for the WORLD!! Because I was built for this, this is how he hand crafted this clay!! And if there was not a process of dying before I got here would I truly be able to live for an adventure such as this?
I have the privilege to love people for the one who loved them first, I get the honor to walk alongside His sons and daughters proclaiming exaltation of love, truth and transformation…………all while He loves on me, all while He stretches my boundaries, expectations and desires beyond my limited mind……
I will miss the warmth of the house on thanksgiving and the giggles as Santa delivers gifts to my nephews and amazingly enough I will miss the first snow fall…….but this, this moment where I can sit and know that I know I am doing what I am suppose to be doing is……….PRICELESS….. It’s untouchable and can flee with the slights curve ball but if I have learned anything this year...when it comes grab it…..So I sit in the Paris airport knowing that whatever self desires that needed to die, whatever choices needed to be made, whatever pain lead to this seat.... it was all worth it……..Boarding time:)
